Hello friends and family. Today is my two year anniversary for transplant!!!! The time has gone by so fast, and yet so slow at the same time. This year has been filled with many a deep breath as I find my way through the transition of healing and recovering, to figuring out how to live a normal life. (normal being a relative term of course.)

Today I am reflecting on many things, and continue to be in awe of this whole transplant process. This day of February 16th will always be a duality for me. While I and all of you celebrate the fact that I am alive and continuing on with these new lungs, there is a family somewhere who is grieving. This day is a reminder to them of the loss of their loved one.

That duality of celebration and grief is something that I will always be turning over in my head, trying to understand the philosophy and meaning of it all.

I do not dwell on it and I do not feel guilty. However, the fact that today marks the anniversary of one person's death and another's life is a duality I cannot quite wrap my mind around.

What I can do is breath deeply and live fully for my donor and her family, and for me and my family.

To the right you see me and an extremely phallic looking Eiffel tower. I am holding a sign that says "Thank You UWMC." (as in University of Washington Medical Center.) I spent about 8 weeks traveling in Europe this past September and October. That trip was a mixture of experiencing the joy of traveling by myself, a victory lap for getting my transplant, and a big Fuck You to cystic fibrosis. It was amazing!

I hope this finds everyone well. I continue to prove that I suck at blogging, the last post was in May 2010, so most likely see you next you year, same time, same place. Except that it will be a thursday and not a wednesday. Much love to you all.

-emily